By David

Air New Zealand is a fantastic airline. There is no need for me to tell you this. Every year the company is rated one of the world’s best carriers. Last week Alison and I were half way across the Pacific in our economy class seats on NZ005 when a steward appeared and handed me a full bottle of French champagne and said, “Welcome back to New Zealand Mr. Wright. How’s the swimming going?” The last time I was mentioned in a New Zealand newspaper this chap was probably still at high school. It was good to be back. I’m not promising champagne but if you get a chance to fly Air New Zealand give them a shot. You won’t be disappointed.

The answer to the steward’s question is seven years; two in the US Virgin Islands and five in south Florida. Enough time I thought for New Zealand to have changed; maybe improved, maybe not. But it hasn’t changed. Everything is so familiar.

The most deceptive speed camera in the world is still in New Zealand, sitting on a steep section of road just outside Henderson. I’m told the camera catches 48 speeding cars every day. The average fine is a modest $50. While I’ve been in the Virgin Islands and in Florida that one camera has earned the New Zealand Government $6.1 million.

Radio Sport talk back is as awful as ever. When is New Zealand ever going to agree on which eleven players should make up the nation’s cricket team? I was pleased to hear Brendan Telfer’s voice back on Radio Sport. He’s New Zealand’s best sport’s broadcaster. I heard he suffered a serious brain bleed last year and wondered how he was getting on. He sounds back to his best. Unfortunately his ability to pick a cricket eleven is as bad as it was seven years ago. New Zealand plays Australia in a cricket test that starts today. For American readers, a test match takes five days. Australia is expected to win. We were however given a glimmer of hope last week when nude photographs of the Australian vice-captain’s girl friend appeared in several Sydney newspapers. We’re all hoping one of Australia’s best players has been put off his stroke – if you’ll excuse the pun.

National Radio still discusses the same unique subjects. For example right now I’m listening to a report on measuring the density of a kiwi fruit. I’m not sure how many of you are interested in this topic. It evidently has something to do with transmitting sound waves through the fruit and the weight of the fruit. So when you purchase a New Zealand kiwi fruit in a south Florida Publix supermarket you can be assured that the science that got it to you in good condition has been broadcast to this county’s four million patient listeners. I’ve just been told the kiwi fruit broadcast will be followed by a discussion on the management of effluent on New Zealand dairy farms. As I said it’s good to be back.

I visited the Lloyd Elsmore Pool in Howick yesterday. Nothing anywhere will ever beat the Onekawa Pool in Napier as winner of the “Worst Pool in New Zealand” championship. But seven years ago Lloyd Elsmore was a close second and featured in several Swimwatch reports on pools to avoid. Not anymore. The Council has built two new pools and has fixed the air conditioning and lighting. Jane refused to swim in the old pool, it was so bad. I think she’d quite like the new version.

One thing that hasn’t changed – thank God – is the country’s medical care. I went to the doctor today to renew a prescription that I should have seen to before we left Florida. I’m glad I waited. The doctor here charged me $30 for the consultation and $9 for the drugs; that’s $39 total. The same visit in Delray Beach would have cost me $100 for the prescription visit and $120 for the drugs; that’s $220. The Pharmacy here gave me an invoice that said the cost of my drugs was $107, the Government paid $98 and I paid $9. If Obama wants to do the same thing in the US, what could possibly be wrong with that? It sure beats the hell out of paying for another 30,000 troops to invade someone else’s oil reserves. But it’s not just about money. The service here was quicker, the rooms were newer and cleaner and the consultation just as professional; better care at 17% of the price. Sounds like a good deal to me. It makes you wonder why seemingly intelligent Americans cling to their expensive, inefficient, capitalist shambles of a system. Just before I left Florida a good friend of mine was diagnosed with a form of cancer. For 24 hours he had to wait for a medical insurance executive to approve the money for his treatment. In this case there was no problem apart from my friend’s 24 hours of stress wondering whether care or profit would win out in the insurance agents mind.

Another win for New Zealand is fish and chips. I’ve had them twice since I’ve been back. They are as good as they ever were. I have no idea why Americans cannot do fish and chips. Even the fish is different. In New Zealand the fish is thick and juicy. The American version is thin and dry. The batter is different as well. Here it’s lighter both in color and texture. I feel confident discussing this subject. When I was at high school I traveled sixty miles by train each Friday to swim in my swim team’s club night. Every week I sat on the train eating two pieces of fish and one scoop of chips. After four years and 208 fish and chip meals you become a bit of an expert on the subject. Any New Zealanders reading this, about to set out on their OE, give American fish and chips a miss. Save your money for the UK. They know how to make fish and chips. They may have even taught us.

So what else have I noticed and enjoyed. Here’s a list; a friendly, reserved people, Marmite, small cars, fantails and tuis in the Titirangi bush, Vogels bread, my brother, the accents, not being asked where I’m from, no one wants to invade another country and newspapers that don’t have pages of stories about overnight shootings. New Zealand always was a great little country to live in. It’s good to know that those responsible for its care have done such a good job. It’s still a bloody good little place.